3 Things That Can Sink Talented People

Count money, man.

Count money, man.

Stacked riches.

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What's up, gang?

Welcome back to another episode of The Grindcast.

Get ready.

It's a new day.

And I want to talk to you today about the three things that can take talented people off

of their mission and get them off of their trajectory of taking their life to the next

level that I have witnessed.

Three things.

Could be more, but these are the key three things.

So, toxic relationships, bad relationships with people that you're intimately involved

with.

Men or women.

The second one, drugs or alcohol, too much of it.

So when I say that, I'm thinking, well, I don't want to be a hypocrite.

I do drink wine once in a while.

You might see me have a beverage once in a while.

It's not all the time thing.

It's not a, oh my God, I can't believe how, you know, I had to carry Simon out of the

place or something like that, but I don't want to be hypocritical.

So I want to clarify, drugs and alcohol, meaning too much alcohol, to wear it to every

day thing or it's a too much of it.

Not even if it's every day, even if it's one day a week, but it's too much of it to

where you're making bad decisions.

It's those things that lead you to making bad decisions is the issue.

And then the third one is ego, ego.

And so let's hit on all three of those things.

So first is the relationship piece.

You have to, in my opinion, you have to make sure that you have the right, significant

other or spouse for the job that you want, for the person that you want to become.

So for example, I got friends that were in the military.

You know when you hear somebody say, you know, I lived in seven different places and

I'm only 21 years old.

Yeah, my family was in the military.

That's a normal thing.

If you're a football coach that's trying to make it and you follow somebody that becomes

the head coach of whatever team, baseball, basketball, football, whatever.

And you follow where they started to where they finish.

How many times do those people have to move?

If I'm a professional baseball player, there's a hundred and some baseball games a year and

they're not all at home.

So that means I'm going to be 60 times on a plane on the road, not with my wife, not with

my family, whatever.

That's a specific spouse or significant other that you need.

If that's a goal that you have, high school football coaches, even that don't travel, how

much time and energy goes into the time that they spend coaching football, watching film

helping kids, having kids over, taking treating kids like their own.

That is a commitment from your spouse.

So I think having a vision of who you want to become, what you want, what your role is

going to be in life and making sure that you choose a significant other or a spouse that

supports that mission.

I had somebody tell me one time when I was asking them about how they would handle certain

situations and it's like, man, either they got the wrong job or they got the wrong wife.

And I don't know which one it is.

You might have the wrong job with the right husband or the right wife or you may have the

right job.

This is what you want to do.

This you know, but you got the wrong girlfriend or boyfriend.

You got the wrong spouse for that job.

It's up to you to pick.

Nobody could pick it for you.

Don't hate to play or hate to game.

It's just like being a parent.

If you're a parent at 25 or you're a parent at 40, there's pros and cons to both.

But the child don't matter.

The job of being a parent don't matter if you're 25 or 40, the job still requires what

the job requires.

It doesn't matter.

So you have to make sure that that spouse, that significant other supports what it is

that you see your vision being.

And two people can be great.

It doesn't mean that they necessarily need to be together.

She could be a great woman.

You could be a great man.

You could be a great woman.

He could be a great man.

But it doesn't necessarily mean that those two things need to be together.

So you've got to make sure, ladies, men, that you have a clear vision of who you want,

what you want your life to look like, what you're going to do with your life, and make sure

that you have a spouse that fits that role, that they're down with that, and that you're

clear with that.

And then you may have somebody that's supportive, but they're also toxic as far as negative.

Nothing's going to be perfect in any relationship.

There is no such thing.

You're always going to have differences, arguments, issues, whatever it is that you've

got to work through.

But like, if you're going to be the president of a college of a university, your husband can't

be falling down three flights of stairs drunk at the basketball game.

You know what I'm saying?

It's a bad look.

If you have a different job, that's okay.

It depends on what the role is, right?

So you have to look and say, man, does this person, are they willing to take the trip with

me?

Is this person holding me down, pulling me down?

Are they helping me in the, in the, in the, are they, are they making me not work towards

my goals?

Are they not a good compliment towards where I want to go on my goals or are they?

And you can't take it too far.

You never take a person for granted, but I'm just telling you, I've watched more people's

careers get killed from relationships.

They're not can count on my hands and my toes of people that could have been great.

That aren't because of toxic relationships and relationship stuff, not being a fit.

All right, so that's a, that's a big one.

I think I tell people other than your relationship with the Lord, I think the best decision, the

second largest decision you'll ever make in your life is the, is the man or woman that

you choose to spend the rest of your life with.

Choose wisely.

You know, I could look back 41 now.

So you know, I just, not saying that I always did everything perfect from, you know, 15

on.

I'm just saying, wisdom looking back.

Be careful dating somebody that you already know a, this ain't marriage material.

This ain't somebody that I'm going to marry.

This person is probably not who I'm taking home to my dad and my mom.

This is not my wife or husband.

This is not somebody I want to spend the rest of my life with.

Not good for me.

Be careful.

Letting that relationship linger because all of a sudden, your passing time with that person

just hanging out, turns into three years, turns into five years, turns into awe.

I don't want to start over.

This person knows me real well.

I'd have to, I don't trust another person to take me another five years to really trust

another person, get to know him another person, all of a sudden you settle.

You settle for less than what you really want it in a person because your standard drop

and you just got comfortable, you got used to it and you just roll with it because

you're casually hanging out for too long and then you can't get out of it.

Just be aware of the person of the relationships or you can, it cannot even be one relationship.

It could be you're in too many relationships that your focus is off.

You're so blinded in love that you're like not focused on your dream and your vision

anymore, not working hard in the process anymore because you're traveling to see this

guy or this girl and your eyes are all over the place versus focusing on taking care of

yourself that that ruins the situation.

That's the first one.

Then the drugs and alcohol pieces like, when you have too much of something that if you're

real with yourself and you look in the mirror and say, man, this is not helping me at all.

This is making me make bad decisions.

This is making me sleep in later than I should.

This is making me lose focus.

Man, I look at every argument that I've had with so and so and it always turns back to

the common denominator is there was alcohol involved or whatever it is.

I'm partying too much on the weekends.

I start to drink in Friday and now I'm hungover on Saturday so I can't work.

I'm not focused.

Then I do it all over again.

Now Sunday, I'm not filling my best so it's like 40% of the week.

I was all discombobulated or I'm out past midnight drinking.

I'm getting an argument.

I'm getting in fights with people.

I'm getting arrested, things like that.

These are things that will slowly take over your life and create a fork in the road that

you may not even realize is happening that could cost you several years of your life

by too much indulging in partying or those things making you make bad decisions.

I know I have some friends of mine.

They can have a drink or two and they're perfectly normal.

They're nice.

Everything's good.

I got some other people I know.

You give them a couple of drinks.

They turn into Hulk, like an animal, like not even a real human person.

What the hell happened?

Who are you?

You just turn into a character, picking up trash cans and what are you doing?

Some people act, it does that to some people.

It would just be real with yourself of like does this do that to me?

What things have been connected to these things in my life that have caused negative things

in my life?

Are there, do you have a drink or does the drink have you?

You know what I'm saying?

Can you have one?

And be cool.

Can you casually hang a little bit or it's like once you get one or two in you, it's off

to the races.

You know how much is that affecting your relationships?

How much is that affecting your life in general?

Is it bringing the best out of you?

Is it holding you down?

Then the third one is ego, lack of humility, really.

Ego, my ego is too big.

I can't apologize to people that I should apologize to.

So then it hurts me at work because I'm not apologizing to people that I should, it

hurts me at home because I'm not apologizing to people that I should apologize to because

my ego won't let me say I'm sorry, not me.

Too big for that, too tough for that, too strong for that, too much to boss for that, shows

weakness so that ego piece of not being able to say I'm sorry, humble myself in a given

situation.

Ego getting in the way of gratitude.

You know I've been telling people, you know as an example, 19 years been with this great

company, Globe Life, American Income Life and we've won all kinds of awards.

I don't say it to be boastful, I think you know you can make an argument on possibly

the best if one of the best, one of the most decorated to do it.

Never have I felt that I was God's gift to American Income, I've always felt like American

Income was God's gift to me.

And the older that I get, the more that I feel that way.

And so I think people's ego that gets out of control, they feel like they are God's

gift to things versus that possibly being a gift to you.

And so I understand.

and appreciate the fact of you gotta have self-respect.

You gotta know your words, you gotta know your value.

But it's that whole, your ego can get so big that it can overtake you.

So you gotta have some ego that value, that self-respect, that confidence, that...

to be great.

And so we talk about it being 51.49.

51% humility, 49% ego.

The minute that those two things get switched

to where you're 49% humility, 51% ego,

you're now getting gobbled up.

You're now in a jacked up situation.

So my thing for you

and for all of us will be just a reminder of

those that humble themselves will be exalted.

Those that exalt themselves too much will be humbled.

And so, you know, how have you shown humility

or if you're making a lot more money today,

are you giving more money away?

If you're in a position of influence,

are you treating people that are on the lower level

with the same amount of love and respect as the people on the higher levels,

the old treatment of janitor as well as you would treat the CEO

from a humility standpoint?

Are you grateful?

Do you remember where you came from?

That's another big piece with ego of like,

who helped you get to where you are?

Where did you come from?

Having some feeling of, man, I owe,

I got to give back.

And so that ego can get out of control

when you start to have success.

It's hardest to be humble when you're having levels of success.

But if you don't,

it can overtake you in ruin the relationships

and ruin your success levels,

ruin your business.

And so ask yourself, you know,

would you say that you're walking in humility?

Can you get better in some of those areas?

Are you showing gratitude to people that helped you,

to people that help you now for your current situation?

Are you looking at all the things that you do,

great?

And nothing that other people do, great?

Are you looking at all the things that are wrong

with your situation?

Do you feel entitled?

Do you have that entitlement mentality?

That's a sign of ego of,

I should have this, I deserve this.

You ever see that Nick Saban video?

Nothing.

Check that out.

Nobody owes you nothing.

So I think just keeping an eye on those three areas

of your life, you know, understanding

you know, none of us is perfect.

I'm coming to you live from the Grandcast Studios

as an imperfect person.

Working every day, every year to try to grow and get better,

which just to grow and get better and accept failures

and accept that there's things that you could do different

and change, you have to do that in the spirit of humility

versus you know it all.

Ego stops you from being coachable.

My ego says I can't learn from a man,

or I can't learn from a woman, or I can't learn from somebody younger than me.

We can learn from everybody.

Coachability.

Can people keep it real with you about some of your flaws

or things that we can do better,

that you can do better?

Can your ego handle it?

Somebody be real with you.

So let's just inspect these three areas this week of our life.

Let's look at our relationships.

Are we managing, how are we doing with our spouse significant other choices?

Is there hard conversations that need to happen this week?

Being real.

How are we doing with the party and overindulging in anything that's causing us to make bad decisions

or making us not be our best self in any area of our life

that we need to review?

And then how are we doing with the humility piece?

How are we doing with the ego?

How's your pride too much?

So okay to have some, is it overdoing?

Are you being coachable?

Are you being grateful?

Are you showing humility?

Are you treating people?

Are you talking to people?

Or the right way?

Or are you walking with gratitude and humility?

And I owe, are you giving to others?

Just check, check, just check your ego.

And we all need that at different times.

Speaking of what we all need,

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I know I've had some conversations and people that have reached out

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Also, we're taking requests.

If there's topics you want us to hit on or anything like that, feel free to hit us up and let us know some things that you would like us to talk on.

And we would be glad to try to get to it.

Hey, hopefully you guys are having a good closeout to 2024.

We're all getting excited for 2025.

And my tip for 2025 is don't wait for 2025.

Let's go get it right now.

As always, thanks for joining us on another episode of The Grindcast.

Get ready. It's a new day.