The Anxiety of Growth

Count money, man.

Count money, man.

That gritch is fine.

I told him.

I'm a beast, bud.

What's up gang?

Welcome back to another episode of The Grindcast.

Get ready.

It's a new day.

And we're going to talk about handling the natural anxiety.

It's kind of like the buzz word now.

Handling the natural anxiety of growth,

just anxiousness that comes with growth.

And I think responsibility because with,

with great growth comes great responsibility.

And you know, with sparks this conversation I want to have

with you today in my hopes to add value to your drive

or to your life is, you know, I had a friend call me

and give me a huge honor.

And that honor was, you know, it was a friend of mine,

spouse.

And they're not in our business at all.

And they're both super successful people,

the husband and the wife.

And the wife calls me and says, hey, you know,

would you mind talking to so-and-so my husband

because I think the pressure and the anxiety

of his new position and responsibility

is getting to him a little bit.

I could tell us where and on him a little bit.

And so this person, you know, recently got promoted,

again, not in our business, got promoted to a position,

been what they've been working for, you know, their entire life.

One of the first phases of multiple promotions

that they'll get over the years.

So it came with more responsibility.

And, you know, anytime you walk, you know,

it's like I give the head coach example.

You know, typically you're not getting a head coaching job

in the NFL because the team is doing so good

and they just wanted a Super Bowl.

They said, man, we need to fire our old coach

and hire a new coach to come in here

and really take us to the next level

because we won so many games.

You know, it's usually you're coming into a program

that lost some games.

Maybe the culture isn't perfect right now.

A little bit down, not a bunch of momentum.

So now here, in plugs this person.

And so, you know, he comes into this situation

so you got all that going on, right?

And then because of that situation,

which has been the goal for so long,

wife has an opportunity to step down temporarily from her job

because of the promotion from the husband,

wife steps down to take care of house,

take care of the home and the children, young children.

And so there's all this going on, right?

And I'm sure a lot of you can relate in some way

shape or form to some of this, right?

So she's like, yeah, I think it's getting to them

a little bit and I'm like, all right, you know,

I'm going to link up with them.

But question is, do you mind if I tell him that I talk to you?

Because if I can't tell him that you talk to me,

it's going to take me a while before I can somehow find a way

to naturally let this conversation evolve.

If you don't mind, I won't bring it up.

But if you don't mind, if I could go right at it

and if I'm asked and I could say it to you then,

then I could get this conversation done soon.

So I get the green light all good, you can do it.

So I have an opportunity to talk to this person

who's younger than me, successful,

been working all his life, you know,

to get first phases of this going.

And I start talking to him about the perspective

that I think that he should have.

I said, first of all, what you're feeling right now

is called the process of greatness.

So I don't care what your title is or what it is,

but nobody gets a free pass.

I don't care if you got a special degree.

I don't care if you got no degree.

Certain levels of greatness come with certain levels

of the process and certain levels of the process

have a period of time where it's a lot of work

and a lot of pressure and a lot of things that you need to do

because if it was perfect and they wouldn't need you,

and so imagine if you were the president of the United States,

or you wanted to be the president of the United States,

look at how these guys are getting scrutinized.

Anybody thinking about running or the person

that's already in there,

look at how they just get blasted,

depending on what new station you turn on,

they're just getting hammered all day.

If you're the president of the United States,

50% of the country's gonna hate you,

probably at least 30% if you're killing it,

30% of people are trying to, they don't like you.

You always got somebody trying to kill you,

people on your own team, people in your own country,

people from outside the country,

you got people trying to assassinate you,

but with great responsibility comes these things

with a great position.

And so I started to point out to him

all of the people around that have it worse than he got it.

And I explained it's not to push down what you're going through

because it is hard.

It's a lot, no doubt.

So don't think that I'm undermining that,

or that I'm not taking it seriously.

I just wanna give you the perspective of

other people that got it worse than you, handle more.

So you could realize that these big problems

are not that big.

So the first step to handling the anxiety

that comes with growth is that you gotta realize,

look around and find people that can inspire you

by how much shit that they've gone through

and how many things that they've had to go through

and how much more that they have to handle

than you have to handle, and try to, that's why reading helps.

So any time that I've read

autobiographies, things about people's come up,

building,

Apple,

building, Tesla, building, Walmart, building, Nike,

and I learned about Sam Walton,

and I learned about Phil Knight,

and I learned about Truett Cathy.

I learned about people that have just accomplished

like crazy things that you would look at and say,

man, it must be nice.

I'd love to be that person.

What will inspire you is if you stop looking at the end result

and you go all the way back to when they're office,

you think you need this lavish office to get the job done

to where they started in their office,

that was the garage or their apartment

or the restaurant that they had,

making burgers, fries, and shakes wasn't that sexy.

And you go back to the process

and when you look at the people that have accomplished greatness

and you look at the things that they've had to overcome,

it can inspire you so you don't feel weird

and you don't feel crazy that what you're going through

is a natural evolution part of the process

that most people, you don't get to the top unscathed.

If it was easy, everybody would be doing it.

So just that perspective, I think, helps.

It's not saying it's easy to go through, but it helps.

And then the second step to that is gratitude,

being grateful in the process of looking at,

are you looking at this new job,

you looking at this new responsibility

of all the burdens that it brings

or are you acknowledging the blessings that it has brought

and that it will continue to bring

and the opportunity that you have,

like your children are healthy.

Your wife is supportive.

The goal you had all these years, she now gets to stay home.

The opportunity that you got to make your freaking mark now

in this new promotion that you got.

If it was all perfect and humming,

you wouldn't have an opportunity to say,

man, that guy really made a difference.

I get to versus I got to,

what are all the things that you got to be grateful for

have you counted your blessings.

You got a brand new house.

Are you allowing the burdens, all the obstacles

to pull you down and blind your eyes

of all the things in your life that you got to be grateful for.

That's the enemy.

The enemy comes to kill, steal, destroy.

The enemy wants to cloud your vision

and only gets you focused on the negative

while being connected to your highest version of yourself,

connected to a higher power,

operating at the highest levels of frequency

is love and gratitude.

God is what I told this person, not perfect.

You know, when I get to talking about God,

you know, I just remind myself and others,

I'm not perfect, nobody is.

But in my conversation with my dear friend,

I told him, man, dig in with God here.

Use this as an opportunity to strengthen your spirit.

One of the obstacles was he had a 75 mile or minute.

I can't remember if it's mile or minute drive there

and then 75 miles or minutes back.

And I told him, switch your mindset from my got to to,

I get to because what does this make possible?

All the things on that drive, 75 minutes, let's call it.

You now have a college on wheels.

You could rip through books, audio books, podcasts,

motivational clips, all these things on your ride there

and from that over the course of a year.

Working on your self-growth, the person that you're gonna become

because of that drive will take you to a whole nother level.

Maybe God designed that drive for you

because you need to grow.

And you wouldn't set the time aside to grow

so the drive helps you grow.

Make phone calls to your mother, to your grandmother,

to people you normally wouldn't talk to,

call your father, call people sometimes on that drive

to where you look back years and say, man,

that was one of the best things that happened to me

because that drive made me talk to people

that I probably should have called

that I wouldn't have found the time to call

in the rat race and so I'm grateful.

You see what I'm talking about?

Doing that inner work of yourself

is what I was talking to them about.

The books, breathing, breath work.

Like I think to handle the natural anxiety

that comes with growth, you combat that with

breath work breathing exercises,

which I know I used to hear people,

there's probably a percentage of you out there

that are listening to me just tuning me out

when I started talking about, I was the same way.

When I saw her breathing exercises,

I pictured myself coaching my wife pregnant like,

like we're about to have this baby, but it ain't like that.

The breath work will change your life,

change the game for you.

Exercise, I told them like, you can't avoid this

and you cannot give excuses to this.

Yes, you do have time, you're lacking discipline,

you can't afford not to take care of yourself.

I don't care if you do push ups, sit ups, planks,

burpees, air squats at your house, walking.

You do have time.

Just getting that heart rate up, that exercise,

that breath work, books, audio books, rest,

six to eight hours of rest, sleep,

listening to positivity.

What are you listening to?

I got a mentor of mine.

Friend talking to, I was going through some stuff.

I'm good, we're just in conversation.

How you doing?

I'm good, I'm alright, how you hanging?

I'm straight, we're all talking through it.

And he's like, hey, what you been listening to?

And I'm like, well, 80% of the time I'm listening to this.

This is playlist that I listen to.

Then when I'm lifting weights sometimes,

when I'm grappling sometimes, I'll listen to this,

which is my, you know, rap.

So that means 20% probably two out of 10.

I'm listening to that eight out of 10.

I'm listening to this.

And I let them see my playlist.

And it's like, oh, chill.

It's chill music and some worship music.

Now again, told you ain't perfect.

I said eight out of 10.

So when I say eight out of 10, it might be chill music,

worship music, the other two just might be two pop.

But more often than not, with the anxiety stuff

keep yourself calm, pay attention to what you're listening to.

Can you put the word of God in your ears?

Can you put motivation in your ears?

Can you put relaxing music in your ears?

Things that calm your spirit down.

And I think what will help you in the process of anxiety

or before you get to tough to...

times, I think what has helped me that I can give to you is choose to put yourself through

tough times because the things that you need to get through tough times, it is what it

is.

So if you can choose to put yourself through tough times, then you have an opportunity to

practice for when that opportunity comes and tough times hit you because tough times don't

last tough people do.

So ways that you could put yourself through tough times, ice bath, cold tubs, cold showers,

nobody wants to do that.

Burpees, nobody wants to do that.

Cardio, fasting, whatever you can make challenging on yourself, if you think about it, what

it takes is mental strength, a deep inner core of passion, belief, faith, mental toughness,

and a lot of those things will transform into when the day comes where you have adversity,

all the tools that you built up in yourself during that process, transform and now they're

helping you in the other part of the process.

And it's not too late.

Like once you already get in it, they say the best time to plan a tree was 20 years ago,

the next best time is today.

Start doing it now.

Watch how it helps you.

You're going through stress and anxiety crazy right now.

Try me for a week.

Try me for a week and then message us and tell us the impact that it's had on you.

Breathwork seven days a week, Wim Hof.

Try to get seven hours of sleep or more.

Put positivity into your mind.

First thing in the morning, motivation, worship music, prayer every single day.

Just to where your heart is pumping, you pushed yourself to where you thought about quitting

the last few reps, burpees, myel, whatever it is, like you had to push through cold tub or

cold shower, watching the words that you speak for a week.

Don't hang around people that are pulling you down, words that are negative, all that.

Just try all that stuff.

Just try that for a week and see if it don't help you out.

Maybe some of these necessary things in the process, they create resilience.

In resilience is what defeats those feelings of anxiety.

There was a quote by Mark Twain that said, I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of

which have never happened.

A lot of the things that people stress and worry about don't even ever end up happening,

it's told years or hours of your life.

I think another thing that will help you when you're having these feelings is to help

other people.

I've learned that through stressful times and hard moments of my life, when I focused on

myself, it caused me more tension.

But when I focused on helping others, it brought me back to joy and peace and what I was

called to do, see if you can't go serve others through your stress.

How can you help other people?

Why you're going through stuff, go help somebody else.

It ain't about you, go help somebody else.

And then do the next best thing so many times I watch people go through stressful times

and they get paralyzed to do nothing because they're going through hard times.

And I don't know what is worse, do nothing or letting it make you worse.

But I feel like they're very similar.

The natural process that may be difficult, that fights this as motion in progress, even

if it's just putting one step, one foot in front of the other.

All you can do is do the next best thing.

So I want to encourage you, if you're going through anxiety or you haven't tough times

or something's going on with you, don't let it stop you, don't pause, don't go backwards,

go forwards.

And what does that mean today?

Because all we got is today.

God didn't promise you tomorrow.

We didn't wake up tomorrow.

A lot of people didn't wake up today that went to bed last night.

The first thing I try to remind myself to do no matter what I'm going through is say,

thank you, God.

Thank you, Lord, for waking me up today.

No matter what may come, no matter what they say about you, no matter what they say about

me, no matter what man, thank you, Lord God.

How blessed are we that we woke up today and we woke up in still in my opinion with all

obstacles, with all my opinion, in the greatest country on earth, the United States of America.

Don't get me to preaching.

I think the first word in there is united.

We need to stop letting people divide us in your business, in your situation, on your team,

and in this damn country.

We got so many different colors, so many different things going on that we forget that

we're all a part of this together.

We need to be the united states of America.

So be grateful, man.

Thank you, thank God.

You woke up today.

Don't let it get you down and do the next best thing.

Don't worry about tomorrow, control today, what's the next best thing that you could do

today?

What's the next best thing that you could do today?

What can you do today?

Let's go, let's handle tomorrow, one step at a time.

Seven days from today, we can't handle.

We can handle today.

We can get ready, strapped up, get mentally prepared and excited about the opportunity that

we got tomorrow due to next best thing.

Don't run from the natural pressure that comes with growth.

As the saying says, pressure makes diamonds, no pressure, no diamonds, no pressure, no

oral series, no pressure, no super bowl, no pressure, no championship, no pressure, no

promotion, no pressure, no progress, no pressure, no prize, no pressure, no praise, no pressure,

no pride, no pressure, no growth.

Embrace the growth, part of the growth with pressure as you feel anxiety.

So congratulations, my friends on the grind.

If you feel a little bit of that, you might be making progress, but don't run from it.

The choice is yours.

If you allow it to make you or break you, it's only about you and how you digest it.

Man, I'm so grateful that I get to speak to you wherever you're at right now in your

car, in your headphones, in your workout, in your liver room.

Wherever you're at, you could have been doing anything else with your time.

And you gave me the great blessing of investing 25 minutes of your time with us with me hoping

that we can make an impact.

So the only thing I ask of you is if you think this helped you or made a difference or

you think you know anybody else that this could help, could you do me a small favor?

Don't take that long, take 30 seconds out.

Can you like comment and more importantly than all of that?

Can you just share it?

Can you share it with somebody in your circle that you know needs to hear this message,

this message that we could go out and help be united?

Because we're all at the end of the day, we're all in this thing together.

All right?

Hey, we appreciate you.

Thanks for joining us on another episode of The Grand Cascast.

Get ready, it's a new day.